By: Raja Babu
The 20th century witnessed much technological advancement, and the 21st century simplified it even further, as one can customize to fit individual needs. The conventional perspective of life has changed, what was once considered as magic has become logic. The communication advancements have literally thwarted all the barriers. But still the world is witnessing noticeable growth in failed marriage rates. Admittedly the world has been shrunken in our hands – then why is the union of souls-the marriage at stake? The oldest form of communication had been between a man and a woman, yet we didn’t master the art of bonding. To stop this marital bond from sinking into the abyss of dissolution, we need to understand certain factors that can save a marital relationship from breakup.
Save the marriage by sharing:
Secrets can never be secret in a martial life, it is be better to start off marital life with the sharing of views, past life and just about anything that’s worth sharing. Being too heavily of an introvert is never healthy for a relationship, nurturing the habit of openness helps the couple to bond better. A couple should share things to save their bonding.
You two should stop outside interference:
Marriage is literally a union of two unknowns hailing from different backgrounds. It may take only a few days for a couple to understand each other or it make take many years for a pair to reach marital harmony. So the gestation period is very crucial for a marital bond to endure, during this time the couple should stay focused on the basics so as to stop the relationship from deteriorating. The greatest threat to a couple comes often from a third party. The husband and wife should consider any one apart from them as the third party. However close a relation or friend may be, their interference will definitely cause trouble among the two. So, never forget marriage is a game of two; the third is always potentially (although of course not always) a liability.
Honesty is the best policy:
Honest couples are the blessed couples who can expect a long-lasting relationship. Two people who remain honest crossing the most challenging junctures will endure all circumstantial inconveniences and their bond endures till death do them apart. Being honest doesn’t actually mean recording and playing back a days event to each other. It is a sense of loyalty that radiates from within and lightens the life partner’s life as well. It is actually a celebration of pride and satisfaction in each other by appreciating each other’s personal space.
Trust and faith allows the bond to endure: Come rain or shine, my life partner remains by my side and however challenging the days get I trust my life partner. Wonderful thoughts linger when there is bond of trust. Being true and faithful nurtures the eternal bond of trust in the marriage. That is why it is said, the objective of a marital relationship is be related to each other’s interests, and the trust is that which helps to endure it.
Love is the magical portion:
If a bride and groom becomes a couple, it takes more than just the superficial signs to celebrate the wedding bliss. It needs an emotional bonding and fondness towards one another. Relationships that strengthen each other and make one yearn for his/her partner’s presence in absence. It makes either of the partners realize he/she is not just the one to live with but the one who one can’t live without. That strange feeling is called the love magical portion for a meaningful life.
By: Tunde Adebayo
A crucial element of any successful relationship
is true and lasting romance. The sad truth
however is that not very many people truly
enjoy a romantic lasting relationship. So in this
article I’ll be sharing with you 5 proven keys you
might not know or might have taken for
granted before now; keys that’ll help you ignite
or re-ignite a true and lasting romance in your
Before I go any further, let me add that
enjoying a truly romantic lasting relationship is
serious business, it doesn’t just happen it takes
effort. What I’m about to share with you is
simple but very powerful, don’t treat it with
levity. Make sure you treat them seriously and
take time to reflect on them and find a way to
work with them in your relationship.
1. Don’t Hope, Decide
A lady went to the airport to welcome an old
friend whom she hadn’t seen for a long time.
While she was waiting, she saw a man arrived
and run towards a woman. She was drawn to
this scene, especially when the man grabbed
the woman, kissed her and exclaimed how
much he had missed her.
Amazed by this
display, she asked the man, ‘Sir, how long have
you been married?’ She expected the answer to
be one or two months. Without so much as a
side long glance at what he obviously
considered a distraction, he replied. ‘Eighteen
years now.’ Assuming that the man had been
away from his family for a while, she pursued
the matter, inquiring, ‘How long have you been
away?’ To her surprise, he said, ‘Two days.’
Amazed, she remarked, ‘I hope I marry a man
like you who will love me as much.’ Hearing
this, the man looked at her and said, ‘Don’t
See, feelings alone don’t make a true romantic
lasting relationship. If it does, everybody with a
feeling will have one hell of a great relationship,
don’t you think? But, is that the case? Of
course not! Why? “Because, true love is not
just a feeling, but a choice”; the love that
will make a relationship really romantic
and sustain it forever, is not something
you wished for, but rather something you
decide upon and work at.
My advice is, stop hoping, stop wishing and
make a decision that you are going to have a
hell of a romantic relationship like you desire,
decide that you will do whatever it takes and
you will not stop until you have achieved your
desires concerning a relationship. Make sure
your decision is strong and solid, so it
gets through to your entire being; mind,
soul, spirit and body.
2. Get Informed. The very first mistakes
people make when it comes to building a
romantic relationship that lasts is being totally
clueless about the do’s and don’ts of building
the relationship of their dreams. It’s important
that you update yourself with new ideas for
improving your relationship, look for new
ideas and new ways of improving the romance
in your relationship. You’ll need new ideas in
many areas in your relationship, most especially
romance and sex. Avoid monotony in your
relationship; variety is what will spice up your
union. Keep yourself up to date with the latest
romantic inventions that will help you improve
your romance and sex. Read books, magazines,
watch relationship programmes on TV, search
the Internet for information, attend seminars,
talks and workshops on romance and
3. Communication is a Catalyst for
Communication is one of the most
important ingredients of a truly romantic
relationship. Breakdowns in communication are solely
responsible for the larger case of unfulfilling
relationships and most of the divorce cases. A lot
of people get it wrong when it comes to
Correct and real communication, the kind
that ignites and keeps the romance burning,
actually involves fewer words. It is
communication that is done with or without
words. They is communication in which there
is mutual understanding of the information that
is being communicated.”Psychologists say that communication is
actually 58% body language, 32% tone
and just 7% spoken word.”
Begin right now to improve on your
communication with your partner. Learn to
sometimes communicate with each other non-
verbally; most especially when others are
present, when out together, during shopping, during
indoor or outdoor activities, etc. e.g. a quick
wink at each other. I can’t stress enough the
importance of this because not getting it
right will make every other thing you might get
right still feel like child’s play.
Let me tell you another fact about communication,
just in case you haven’t heard it before; the
only way to know how to communicate
effectively with your spouse is to
4. Know Your Partner’s Love Language. By
observation and by asking your spouse
questions, learn and understand your mate’s
love language. Understanding your partner’s
love language will greatly improve your
intimacy and help you both to enjoy a better
sex life in your relationship.
Every individual communicate his/her emotions
and feelings in different ways and when you
understand the language your spouse uses in
communicating his/her love and feelings, you’ll
be able to easily engage him/her better using
that same language and that will explode your
romance, intimacy and sex.
5. Make Sex a Priority. Make your sex life a
priority in your relationship. Good sex is very
important to your relationship, I mean very,
very important. You have to really take time to
work at it. Take time to adjust your schedules
to create enough time for sex so that it doesn’t
suffer neglect. Don’t allow any other thing to
take the place of good sex in your relationship,
never your work, or career and not even your
children (unless it’s a real emergency!).
A vibrant sex life is a must for you to enjoy a
true and lasting romance in your relationship.
Good sex takes great effort, so be highly
committed to improving your sex life with new
and fresh ideas, seek for new ways to add
flavor to your sex life,information on how to
make your sex better
and more enjoyable every day. Learn new sex
positions and sex ideas.
A weekend exclusively for you and your spouse
wouldn’t be a bad idea, if you’ve got kids you
can drop the kids off with friends or family
and you can go to a nice hotel. What
about a visit to the place where you had your
honeymoon; wouldn’t that be romantic?
Decide right now that you will have your
desires concerning your relationship and
you’ll do whatever it’ll takes.
Go get the necessary information you’ll need
to make it happen.
Learn how to communicate with your
spouse correctly and start to connect and
communicate with him/her.
Know your partner’s love language and start
to engage and connect with him/her using
Make your sex life a priority; and since it’s
something “you must do well”, then get
the necessary information and resources
that’ll help you get it done right”.
In conclusion; you’ve got to continue working
on making your relationship better every day,
take time to reflect on your relationship
together with your partner and like I said earlier
get yourself informed and learn to always act
on the things you learn or discovered.
By: Ann Lee
Have you ever wondered what are the main differences between men and women? Here are some of the funnest or funniest differences between men and women.
- Women always have the last word in a discussion!
- Women appear to always be right in everything!
- Usually, women make the rules in a relationship!
Bedroom: Women – have always clean and tidy rooms Men – have always messy rooms
Bathroom: Men – three maximum four items; Women – thousands items, but never enough!
Shopping: Men – always know what they are looking for; Women – go shopping and buy everything they find!
Future: Women always think about the future; Men never think about the future until they actually meet a woman
Memory: Women will always remember a fight and continue recounting it for many years to come; Men: when a man says ‘Let’s forget everything and start all over again’ he really means that!
Grocery A woman will make a list on a weekly basis and will go shopping for much more things than anticipated; Men will wait until there will be nothing left in the fridge but a bottle of beer and a banana and only then they will go shopping for food ‘As long as there is beer, I don’t need anything else!’
Sex: Women prefer at least 30 minutes of foreplay; Men prefer 30 seconds of foreplay
Magazines: The majority of women prefer ‘lifestyle magazines’ or ‘cooking magazines’; Men, I believe we all know the truth, prefer ‘magazines with naked women’and ‘car magazines’, anyway something technical or erotic.
Dressing: Women need at least an hour to prepare before getting out of the house; Men get whatever comes first out of the closet and off they go! 10 minutes is more than enough
Laundry: Women will do laundry on a regular basis; Men will wear everything they have and only when they will get to the last piece of clean clothing, only then a bell will ring for them!
Interpretation of words:
‘A guy thing’ – women: There is that common day of the week when you have to stay home, because I need some time alone to spend it with my friends!
‘Do you want me to help you with the dinner?’ – women: Isn’t that ready yet? I’m hungry! I can’t believe how slow you are!’
‘Yes, yes, of course’ – women: Bla, bla. Shut up once and for all! We’ll do as you like so that you won’t speak that much!’
‘Take a break honey! You are probably dead tired!’ – women: ‘I don’t want you disturbing me anymore! I want to see the game in silence! Keep it low! Will you? And no, I don’t want to help you!’
‘I’m doing this for you! I have some strong reasons!’ – women: ‘I’ll think of some strong reasons next time! I promise!’ ‘I’ll help you with the chores!’ – women: ‘You’ll do the work, while I’ll put on some quality music, just for you babe!’
By: Alexandra Sienkiewicz
While modern technology facilitating immediate and constant access continues to increase, personal communication between couples is on the decline. Such advancement in our culture has crippled the human touch, to the point of detriment in relationships.
There have been entire relationships that have begun and ended over text messaging. Why? One of, or both partners misconstrue the intent of the communication leading to hurt, anger and inflated emotions. Often an entire argument ensues over a misunderstood message and takes place via texting. Texting in a relationship is not an effective way to communicate with your significant other. Particularly when it comes to matters of the heart.
Texting is fine and very efficient for coordination of daily business, errands or schedules. Keep the texting in a relationship to things such as “I’m stuck at work. Can you pick up the kids from school today”? Or “We need milk. Can you stop at the grocery store on your way home?” Making plans via text message is appropriate as well, such as “there is a movie on at 7 p.m. that I would like to see, do you want to join me?” You get the idea.
Short love notes that tell the other person you are thinking of them is another great use of electronic media. It’s always nice to hear sweet nothings from a loved one. Keep it short and sweet. Don’t script the text in a manner that requires a response. Thoughtful texts such as “thinking about you”, “love you”, “missing you”, “last night was really nice”, etc… This type of message often gets a reply but if not, don’t sweat it. If you are seeking a response at the outset, then wait to say it in person.
Sexting, when used as a prelude to a romantic encounter or date night can peak interest and increase arousal. It can be very sexy for both men and women, if done tastefully. The text message should be a tease, just enough to get your partner into the bedroom. With the intimacy of the bed, you pull out all the stops.
The power of verbal and face to face communication cannot and should not be replaced with texting. For most people it’s extremely difficult to structure your typed message in a way that truly conveys the context and meaning intended. Even more challenging is the recipient’s ability to read or in many instances, not read in between the lines of the message.
Many couples have a hard time communicating verbally with one another and texting can help to break the ice, but use it carefully and wisely. Always follow up your text with a real conversation. Preferably you are able to speak face to face but if not, a phone call is effective most of the time.
Apply balance and don’t abuse the plethora of alternative communication. Relationships clouded with a false sense of communication will implode. You will be face to face with your significant other, so learn to speak to each other in person more often than you text.
You can’t text your way to a meaningful and sustainable relationship.
By: Isabel Kroemer
Fixing a broken heart is never easy. There are no shortcuts to stop your heart from hurting so much. Going through this painful experience can feel like you are underwater – you cannot breathe. You have built your life around that person, you trusted them, took care of them and with just a blink of an eye – they are gone.
This unpleasant happening can leave people feeling angry and depressed. Some even ask, what can the future bring them? They will think they are unworthy, thus leaving them feeling confused and miserable. Nevertheless, you can avoid this. These suggestions might guide you in the process of healing.
1. Go through it, not around it.
The first thing you have to do is to stand still and feel the loss. In order to move on, you need to grieve. Going through the pain is your way of becoming stronger.
2. Detach and celebrate your independence.
Do not rush into a new relationship nor win your lover back. Learn how to fill the emptiness that you feel by going out with your friends and family.
3. List your strengths.
Get a pen and paper and write everything that is good about you. This will help you discover that you are a good person.
4. Help someone else.
When you allow yourself to give some attention to another person who needs help, then you are able to forget your problem for a split second. As a result, you will feel good about yourself.
6. Laugh. And cry.
As laughter can heal you, so is crying. A biochemist found that emotional tears contain toxic biochemical by-products. Therefore, when you start weeping, these toxic substances are removed and can relieve your emotional stress.
7. Work it out.
You can literally work out your grief by running, swimming or other exercise . At the emotional level, it is through exercise that you can take charge of yourself, making you the master of your own mind and body.
8. Find hope.
Hope is the moment when you believe that your sadness can evaporate. However, in order to have hope, you must learn to forgive. If you have achieved this, then it is easier for you to move on.
Once you experience feeling bruised and burned from a relationship, there are two options you can choose from: you can either close your heart so that no one will ever get inside or you can love again, the way you did before. Just remember that there is always someone who is willing to help you, it may be your family, close friends or a professional.
By: Richard Hewitt
We all have a spiritual partner or a soul mate, who has come in this world to help us to become our most authentic and highest version of ourselves and help us to achieve our best. Without this amazing bond and partnership life will be very empty. All the religions have some version of this idea. It is true and most of the traditions believe that there is one soul or person or spirit that help you to overcome the hurdles of life, is in partnership with you in this process. You come into this world to evolve spiritually and people often experience and relive old traumas time and again, simply to learn how to overcome them as spiritual, authentic beings. Most of the times, your soul mate is an important part of this process.
The romantic relationships of every person have the potential to bring us great happiness but they can also be a source of suffering and great pain. In the start of a relationship, everybody falls head over heals in love and it seems that all dreams have come true. Unfortunately, these good feelings can fade away and then you struggle to feel the love for your partner.
Before you find a love partner, you must know what you want exactly. You should make a list of the qualities which you want in your partner and do not settle for something superficial. And also don’t think that he has to be rich, good looking and famous. You should be realistic. You should go for a guy who is independent, respects women, has a stable job and most important you enjoy his company. To find a love partner, you should learn the art of waiting and wait patiently for the right person. If your partner is your best friend then you are a very lucky person because you have already found your true love.
If you want to find your love match, there are many types of tests available that can help you in checking compatibility. In order to find true love, it is not enough to love your partner. There are some simple principles that you need to understand. What makes for true love is honesty and commitment. A relationship cannot exist without trust and honesty. If you feel the need to hide your true feelings instead of sharing with your partner then your relationship may be in deep trouble. Your companion should know everything about you. Without honesty and trust, you will never be able to find true love.
By: Connie Lewis
How do you talk dirty to your boyfriend? Many women would love to talk dirty to their boyfriends but don’t even know how to start, let alone knowing what to say. Talking dirty to your boyfriend may not be as hard as you may think. As a matter of fact, it should come out naturally without having to try so hard.
Remember that talking dirty to your boyfriend does not mean trying to overly impress him but remaining true to your inner feelings. Learning how to talk dirty can improve sex between you and your boyfriend. After all is said and done, if your thoughts are sexy it goes without saying that you won’t find it difficult to compose dirty phrases for your boyfriend.
So exactly how do you talk dirty to your boyfriend? Here are some tips:
1. Don’t be afraid to let him know when you are horny. During sex, a few naughty things will pop up. If you can think of them during sex, it then means that you can say it to your boyfriend. If you are sexually stimulated it’s certainly going to sound dirty effortlessly.
2. Assume he was a guy you have a crush on or a one night stand. The quest to discover how to dirty talk a guy is about getting involved in dynamic imagination. Constantly evaluate sexual fantasies that arouse you.
Imagine he was this sexy guy you have had a long time crush on and ended up in bed with him. How would it feel? Probably you would experience multiple orgasms. Have that in your mind and tell him about it.
3. Speak to him like you are having an affair. If you want to create sexual anticipation with you man before you get to bed, provoke him by sending him dirty texts that will describe what you want him to do to you as soon as you get some time alone with him. As long as you get into the intimate details, you will never ask how do you talk dirty to your boyfriend again.
4. It is not about what you say. You may use sexy words to dirty talk your man, but it is not always what you say, but how you say it. That’s what makes all the difference. Be confident and drop him a few dirty words in his inbox. To help you through, here are a few dirty phrases that you can use to get the wheels spinning as you seek to untangle the question how you talk dirty to your boyfriend.
Honey, you make me so wet.
I totally love your sexy shoulders.
On my, it is so big, I love it!
I love the feeling when you are inside of me.
Don’t stop give me some more.
You are so sweet.
By: Ana Huong
Would you want trust in your relationship? Some people think having too much trust is a wonderful thing while others think you should spice things up and be unpredictable. What is good for you? Do you desire to have trust in your relationship?
Having a trust in a relationship is wonderful I think. It can make your relationship more fulfilling and interesting.
First of all you need to try to be honest with yourself and your partner. You need to be honest about what you want and what you feel at the moment. Tell it how it is.
Trust your feelings. Communicate to your partner how you feel and his trust toward you will grow. If you always express what you mean and mean what you say it can be very important to your partner. This is a number one step to grow your trust in your relationship.
Learn to trust your partner. Have faith in your partner, trust hi or her because this is a foundation of your relationship. You need hi or her support in building a relationship based on trust. If you don’t trust your partner, if you don’t have faith in him to support your relationship, then it will be a lot harder to achieve a mutual trusting relationship. Give him a chance to learn to trust but be realistic don’t expect unreal capabilities from him or her.
Be honest with each other. Share most of your secrets. Tell your partner everything important he or she needs to know. Many relationships break if the secrets come out, so be honest and smart about what you tell. Having less secrets and less surprises in your life will improve your trusting relationship a lot.
Don’t be afraid to tell your partner what you expect from him or her. Tell about your needs and what you want. It takes a lot of courage to be comfortable and open about telling your needs to your partner but it is the best thing you can do for your relationship.
If you begin to assert yourself in this manner your partner will then become more comfortable in communicating their needs to you and the end result is more trust in the relationship.
Don’t always agree and have courage to say no sometimes. Your partner has to know his or her boundaries and he or she should respect it. Tell how you feel and make sure if you disagree with something, you just express your opinion without offending. You partner should respect the difference of opinion and only if it’s really something important is it necessary that you each have the same opinion on it.
You will also experience heartbreak during your relationship and how you deal with it, if you cope with it well, will help your trust for each other even more. It can make your relationship very deep and fulfilling.
By: Samantha Jayne
Whether youve been in the dating scene long enough or just starting to see other people, there are certain maxims that remain constant. These classic dating rules continue to exist because theyve been proven to make your dating life run smoothly. Keep these in mind and youll surely avoid committing social and dating suicide.
1.Past is past.
Everybody has a past. Bringing it up won’t change it nor is it a tad bit necessary. What do you hope to accomplish by dissecting every single bit of information which is considered history? Jealousy and pointless competition? Your dating history should highlight only your best, and although the best relationships are grounded on honesty, full disclosure might not be the best way to go. Your past is there to teach you things that you should NEVER do again in the future, not to show your date that you are a psycho. And one more thing: never badmouth an ex. Your current date may think you may do the same to them should your relationship end for some reason. Thats not really putting your best foot forward, right?
2.Your date is not an icon of worship.
Never put them on a pedestal. That goes without saying that stalking is definitely out of the question. Give the other person room to breathe. Too much worshipping always ends in disaster. It may seem romantic to you, but to the other person, you are just another overbearing, desperate individual and theyd run off the first chance they get.
3.Less is more.
Do not flood them with phone calls, e-mails, tweets, Facebook messages or tags, pokes, and other what-nots. Im sure you might think they gestures are cute, but they are not. Always leave them wanting more. If you shower them with too much attention, they have the tendency to become lax and complacent. Do not initiate contact always, let them come to you once in a while.
4.Never lead them on.
It is never good to play with someone’s feelings. You are not only doing them a disservice but you are also wasting your time. Why spend effort and energy on something that you have no plans on pursuing in the long term or something that you think will not work out? Be a man (or woman) and stand up and walk away. Do not go on dates just so you can show your friends that you have a dating life.
5.Do not be needy.
The other person shouldn’t be considered as the missing puzzle piece that you are looking for to complete you and provide for everything missing in your life. In order for any relationships to work, it requires two whole people and not two halves. You shouldn’t allow your relationship to define you but rather, you should bring definition to your relationship. Do not look for answers to your midlife crisis in your relationship, otherwise it’ll end up in disaster and resentment from both partners once your expectations and needs are not met.
Especially for the ladies. Never make the mistake of settling for the first nice guy who comes your way. The whole point of dating is to find the person who best suits you, not the one whom you can describe as he or she will do for now. It will never work out because there is something more you would always want from them which they cannot provide because they weren’t the best one for you in the first place.
7.Do not rush things, especially sex.
We continue to exist in a fast-paced society where everything seems to be rushed. You are pressured to find the right partner, get married, have kids, and stay together forever. Relationships tend to develop at their own pace. The best timetable for you to have on when to act on things is your gut feeling. Wait until things feel right, rather than doing them just because they’re expected of you. Do not tell someone you love them because you think youve been dating long enough. Say it because you mean it.
So you think being friends with an ex after a break up is the mature thing to do? It probably is, but it isn’t the best course for you to take when you are seeing someone new. Do not hope and expect that you can remain close and friendly with an ex when you are starting a new relationship, it will only breed insecurity even in the most open-minded individuals. By all means, remain amiable with your exes but never let them linger around your new partner. Focus on your new man or woman.
8.Do not discuss other men, or women.
You might still be in the early stages of your relationship and you might still want to swim in the sea before you get hooked and establish exclusivity with him or her, but never dangle other people you are seeing in front of your date. Be respectful and let them know that you’re dating others, but don’t go into the gory details. And men, never check out other women in your date’s presence. And never use others to stir up jealousy in the hopes of reviving excitement in a long-term relationship.
9.Never lose yourself.
People tend to lose their identity and let themselves go once they’ve settled into a relationship. They get too comfortable so that they no longer feel the need to impress their partners. They know you are a real person with real flaws, but it shouldn’t be an excuse to let things slide. Continue working on yourself and grow from your passions. After all, they became attracted to you because you are who you are, not a slob who settled into being the mirror of someone else.
By: Mohammad Bagheri
In every dating, conversion or flirting, there are some very common mistakes that a man makes which kill the woman’s attraction to him very fast. These mistakes are very very important and all men need to know about them and stop them from happening:
Don’t talk in depth about past relationships
The first common mistake is this one! Your past relationships are the last thing that a woman wants to know about you. She is having a date with you not with your Ex! First thing you need to know is don’t start the conversion about your past relationships, second, if she asks you, answer very briefly. This is best for you and it won’t kill her attraction, in fact it can be very sexy!
Don’t avoid eye contact
Don’t be shy, be smart and be a gentleman. Don’t be afraid of looking at her eyes. Your eye contact will show you how much confidence and self-esteem you have so it is a very important matter. But don’t stare her down either.
Don’t keep your hands to yourself
Always use your hands in conversion. Use your hands to show her examples and show your body language to her using your hands.
Don’t devalue yourself
And here we are, the biggest mistake of all time which is made by many men. When you get a bit comfy with someone, you start to tell her your secrets or maybe stuff that you haven’t said to much to people about yourself. This is a very big mistake because from the beginning of your relationship you are showing how weak and NOT SECURE you are.
Don’t ignore her body language and reactions
Women need attention and one of the most common ways that they show it is their body language. Make sure you pay attention to her body language. Body language is one of the best ways to be a winner after a date because you can see how is she feeling about the conversion or anything that you are saying or doing — it is like reading her mind!
By: David Baker
One way to get over a failed relationship is to go find someone else and start anew. If so, you will be entering what they call a rebound relationship. Rebound relationships are formed right after one or both parties have been in a failed relationship, and when there is still an emotional connection to the ex partner. These types of relationships often end up in another break-up. It tends to happen so fast it will make your head spin. This happens because the party who has just been through an unsuccessful relationship is still often attached to his/her ex partner, thus total emotional connection to the rebound partner may not occur.
Given that this type of relationship rarely works, why do people enter into these anyway? Read the list below to find out the reasons why people still immerse themselves in this situation.
1. To distract themselves. Having a broken heart can be extremely painful, especially if future plans have already been laid out for with their partners. The break-up experience can make them just mope in bed all day long, or sometimes it can even bring out thoughts of suicide. Finding someone else to be with can help them mask the pain that they feel.
2. To satisfy their attention needs. Your ex is probably the closest person to you before the break-up had happened. Hence, it is only normal to feel alone in the aftermath of that unfortunate, bitter ending. Entering a rebound relationship can make you feel needed and important again. Though you may ask your friends to accompany you during those desperate times, the attention that a partner can give a person still cannot be replaced by the company of friends.
3. To realize their self-worth. One’s market value and one’s tenure in a commitment are inversely proportional as many would say. Typically, the longer a person stays in a relationship, the lesser he/she is seen as attractive by others. This is due to the fact that people become too complacent with the way they look. The only opinion that matters to them is of their partner’s which tend to patronize them to lower the chances of finding a replacement soon after if ever things didn’t go as planned. Once they have found that someone who will love them after an unsuccessful relationship, especially for relationships lasting for over a year, they start to feel good about themselves. That gives them the impression that they are still marketable the same as the latest gadgets many people are fond of.
4. To get their ex jealous. It’s a fact that when people enter rebound relationships, their previous relationships have not been resolved yet. Hence the term rebound. With that, people are in a way amused to find out that their actions still affect their ex partners. But that is not always the case; some of them commit to rebound relationships with an intention of getting their ex back. Though it may sound absurd, take note that jealousy may trigger an emotion that could make people do things that are hard to explain.
Whatever the reasons you may have in entering rebound relationships, it is always a must to keep in mind that the rebound partner is also dragged into the pain you are into, there are times when they even suffer more than what you may be experiencing. It is downright unfair to treat them as someone disposable, like the times when you get rid of your dead goldfish because you forgot to feed it, or when you purchase a brand new smartphone to replace your old one from time to time. You must not forget that they are also a human being capable of getting hurt. Still, the best way is to take the high road and resolve whatever issues you have with your ex even before planning to start anew to ensure that what you will be having won’t just be a rebound.
By: May Michael
There are some very basic methods that you can use when you’re trying to get the guy of your choice attracted to you. Some will help you in getting his attention and the rest of them will help you KEEP it. Then he’ll keep finding you interesting.
First of all, figure out what your strengths are and emphasize them. It may take someone trustworthy to show you what your good points are as well as your less good ones. When you do figure out your strengths, it’s important that you use them the best that you can. Remember that you usually only get one shot at making a good impression because men don’t have long attention spans.
Let the beauty of your eyes, hair, and smile come through. Try to be graceful. The fact that you’re a woman needs to show in the way you carry yourself along with your facial expressions. Show off any talents you have and keep negative traits in hiding.
Your social skills are also quite powerful. Captivate your man with your sexiness, playfulness and flirting. Learn to make small talk that will keep everyone around you interested.
Show how unique you are from all other women. This can be done by displaying good taste and putting your best foot forward in all situations. When a man is trying to decide between two women, hell pick the classiest one.
What might initially seem to be the perfect match may not be so great after all if the two people have nothing in common. A successful relationship must have common interests and dreams. There needs to be a good balance between talking and listening. Couples on the same wavelength usually bring out the best in each other.
Self-confidence is also attractive to men. This shows that you’ve got the courage to do what’s right and to stand up for what you believe in. The self-confidence that allows you to do that and not care what others think will get you significant attention.
Of course, you’ll also need to do whatever you can to stand out from all the other women. Use all of your best assets to show how great you are. Just don’t do it in fake way. Guys need to see the person you really are. When you’re relaxed, other guys will be relaxed around you. If you’re making guys nervous, it will just drive them away. So when you can help guys feel relaxed with you, they’re also more confident of themselves.
Listen closely to the things your guy talks about and you’ll draw him closer to you. A good listener is something else that men appreciate in a woman. If you can make a man feel that he’s the only person you see in the room, he’ll be wrapped around your little finger. When you find the right techniques, you’ll get any guy that you want. It’s just a matter of being exciting while also being caring and supportive. You’ll have the relationship of your dreams.
By: Eula Wyatt
Don’t wait for your guy to knock on your door and sweep off your feet. Take the first step towards a happy love life. Here are five best places to meet eligible good men.
Sharing a common interest with your man is a must in any relationship.
Be yourself and go to your fave music hang-outs. Hit up your local instrument store for guitars, keyboards or drums. Attend concerts – rock, ballad, jazz.
Visit art galleries and exhibits. For intellectual stimulation, head over to museums and other cultural institutions.
Be present at your favorite authors book signing event. Drop by the nearest bookstore in your area.
Being in men-dominated joints is a great avenue to get your pheromones up and about.
Guys love fixing and renovating all types of things so hanging out here is a good idea. This is also an opportunity to stir the male species’ attention especially if you have a DIY (do-it-yourself) project at home.
Men love technology. From laptops and smart phones to sophisticated sound and entertainment systems, youre bound to see them browsing around and checking out tech gadgets.
Regardless if its Friday night or the usual weekday after-work hang-out, youre bound to encounter all kinds of people here. So wear your pheromone cologne and get ready to mingle.
Who could ever resist the beauty and elegance of gorgeous cars all lined up for everyones viewing? Certainly not them. Be at your finest feminine self and grace the occasion with a friend or family.
Remember that opportunity waits for no one so take on the challenge, leave your house and get your man.
Be it on your way to work or for vacation and sight-seeing purposes, dare to commute publicly. Try riding a jeep, bus, and train. Kill time and stay longer at airport lounges.
Walk by the beach early in the morning or near sundown. Chill out with family during weekends. Build a bonfire and spend a relaxing night with friends.
Walking your dog is a popular approach if you want to socialize with subtlety. So grab that leash and visit the park. Do it during the busy afternoons where you get to meet lot of pet owners.
Restaurants, coffee shop, cafe or diner, these venues are all part of anyones daily routine so make it a point to dine in there when you have the chance. 4.
Attending such functions increases your networking universe. Be it conventions, parties, weddings or reunions, see to it that you never let down an invite once it comes your way.
Who doesn’t want a healthy and fit body?
Watch a basketball, football or soccer games live! As much as possible, book tickets near the players box.
Hit up your town center for a wide variety of items and equipment to choose from – knee pads, personal dumbbells, tent, swimsuit. You name it.
A lot of the male population is very health-conscious. Some would really shell out money just to become a member of a body-building program to build six-pack abs. Hence, grab the chance if there are free trial memberships in your vicinity.
By: Tom King
To identify key decisions in your life, first, look at your current circumstances because they are a reflection of your beliefs and assumptions. If you find there is a pattern to your circumstances and your behavior then you know you made a key decision that is being played and re-played out in your life. For example, if you go from one bad relationship to another, you likely made a key decision about yourself and relationships that keeps you from experiencing loving, intimate connections. Or if you have chronic problems with money, again there is a key decision about what money means or what you deserve. Maybe you find yourself exhausted because you are always working and never give yourself a break. Did you make a decision at some point that you must constantly strive to do more, have more, be more?
One very useful exercise is to write your autobiography in order to review your life story. Think back over your life and write down your memories about what you experienced, what life was like, what you felt. Start as far back as you can. What do you remember between the ages of 0-5, 5-10, 10-15, and so on? It is best to hand write your story on paper because this will engage your right brain more and stimulate your forgotten memories.
After you have a good collection of memories written down, take some time to look for significant events and for themes.
What patterns can you see?
How did you respond to difficult events or pattern of events?
How did you try to make yourself feel better?
What did you do to try to succeed, get attention, or feel significant?
Can you see ways you learned to protect yourself?
By answering these questions and reflecting on the themes in your life you should be able to see some key decisions you made that have influenced the course of your life and how you have lived.
A couple I am working with, the wife had an interesting story to tell. She grew up with her mother and an old sister. Mom had men in and out of her life and some of them were controlling and abusive. Mom worked hard and went out often so my client basically had to cope with life on her own. She found refuge in her friends and their families and got some of her needs for attention met. She made some key decisions to cope with life by trying to be perfect and make people like her. She also decided she wanted to have a large family and dedicate herself to being the best mother she could be.
The key decisions this client made helped her get some of her needs met as a child and to be successful as a wife and mother as an adult. However, she was also very sensitive to any indication of not being loved and valued. In the previous article we learned that her husband was good at providing and working hard but not skilled in emotional connection. She responded in the only way she knew, which was to be even more perfect and work for his acceptance. Inevitably this pattern led to resentment for both of them as they were not really getting what they needed from one another. Again the good news is they both made a commitment to learn how to change the key decision patterns and create a new quality of connection.
By: Debbie Schaefer
The first steps to recover from infidelity are never easy. In fact they may be the most painful steps you will take as an individual or as a couple as you try to rebuild the trust you had in your partner.
As the victim of your spouse’s affair, there is a lot to deal with right after you find out about their indiscretion. Assuming this affair was meaningless to your spouse and they are asking for your forgiveness, you have to do a self-assessment first. You have to answer a number of personal questions yourself before you can truly deal with your mate and decide what your next steps are as a couple.
Your self-assessment needs to include answering these questions:
Do you want your marriage to survive?
Can you forgive your spouse for their thoughtless act?
Can you rebuild your trust in your spouse?
What do you need from your spouse to aid your healing?
How can you turn this adversity into a positive for your marriage?
For our purposes in this article, we are going to assume you have decided that you want the marriage to survive and both of you are willing to take the necessary steps to heal your marriage. Many couples are not able to overcome this heartbreaking moment in their relationship so you have to approach this healing phase with patience and an open heart and mind.
In order to recover from infidelity, the injured partner has to be able to get past the emotional trauma of your mate’s unfaithfulness. It is not a matter of forgiving and forgetting because that is nearly impossible to do, but it also is not about clinging to destructive thoughts either. In other words, you can’t continue to bring this dreadful act of selfishness up every time you get angry at your spouse. You have to accept their acts of forgiveness as genuine and sincere then focus on the reasons why you still want to be with them.
What we are really saying here is that you must be solutions-oriented during this time if you really want to save your marriage. Again, it will not be easy to do, but we have seen many couples survive this horrible period in their marriage then thrive as the years went on in their relationship. You can do it too if you focus on building the lost trust, sharing your feelings openly and honestly and looking for meaningful ways to reconnect with your partner.
Once you get to a comfortable place in this re-building process then you can begin to go deeper into the reasons this affair occurred and how you can avoid this happening again. Let’s look at some of the things you will need to discuss with your mate to begin to recover from infidelity and get true healing in your relationship:
The first thing you need to realize that you did nothing wrong that led to your mate’s indiscretion, but it may be an indication that something important is missing in your relationship. With that said, you must begin to have honest, non-judgmental discussions with each other so they know how deeply you are hurt and how they can help you deal with your pain of betrayal.
Another step you must take to recover from infidelity is to hear your mate’s side of the story. You need to understand what they were feeling about you and your relationship that would allow them to betray you by having an affair. Did they feel neglected or lonely? Did they feel your love life was lacking? Was there something deeper going on inside that created deep, emotional issues? Once each of you know and understand each other’s feelings then you can begin to work on re-building your marriage from an empathetic point of view.
It is very natural for you, as the one who was betrayed, to go through a series of emotional ups and downs that include bouts of extreme anger. In order to recover from infidelity and save your marriage, you may need to seek professional counseling help or find other marriage counseling resources to help you, like books or online resources. Dealing with anger is never easy, but time does heal all wounds so you need to be patient during this important process.
At some point in your recovery process, you will need to forgive your spouse for their indiscretion. We are not talking about saying a few simple words of forgiveness, but a true, deeply felt expression of forgiveness. This act of forgiveness is for both your mate and for you. You may ask, “Why do I need this?” You need this as much for your own sanity as anything. You need this so the anger and bitterness don’t eat away at you for the rest of your life. You need to be free of this anger bondage if you want to completely recover from infidelity and get on with your life.
While it may be extremely painful to recover from infidelity, it can be done if you and your mate are patient and diligent in your efforts to rebuild the trust in one another and your relationship. Unfortunately, the “for better or worse” turns into worst, but it can return to better and lead to “till death do us part” if you work together to recover from infidelity. If you want to save your marriage, you can never give up on each other or your relationship.
By: Jonathan Wilson
Let’s face it. Marriage isn’t really always permanent and there are chances that you might not spend your entire life together with your spouse. There are a lot of factors that could contribute to a crumbling marriage. If the couple doesn’t make an effort to fortify their relationship, their marriage will surely fail. If you don’t want this to happen to your marriage, it is not too late to learn 7 tips on how to fix a marriage. Read on to find out how.
1. In order to know how to fix a marriage, the spouses should first find out what their particular problems are. Their marital problems may be because of money, unfaithfulness, meddling in-laws, children and more. Once they pinpoint the causes, they’ll be able to start finding ways to resolve their difficulties.
2. Lack of proper communication in a marriage always causes a lot of conflicts and confrontations. To truly communicate, do not just stick to chit-chats, polite conversations or indifferent greetings. You must open up and share your feelings. Lower your walls and talk about things you are truly passionate about. Don’t be afraid to share your opinions. Encourage your spouse to do the same as well. Open and honest communication helps you and your spouse understand and get to know each other better.
3. Establishing a solid marriage requires a lot of trust. Make sure that the both of you honestly express the things that each of you is thinking and feeling. Upon sharing these thoughts and emotions, don’t judge or laugh. Respect everything that comes out of your spouse’s mouth.
4. Fix your marriage by spending a lot of quality time together. Go out on dates and make your spouse feel cherished and important. If your weekdays are swamped, go out during weekends even if it’s just for simple meal. Relish the time together by not discussing any problems even for just that moment.
5. One of the best ways on how to fix a marriage is to prioritize your spouse and make him/her feel important. As you grow older, it will be your spouse, not your parents or your children, who will be staying by your side forever. Show your gratitude and love to your spouse by consistently showing affection, listening to talks of fears and ambitions, and cater to his/her needs.
6. Should you feel overwhelmed and don’t really know how to fix a marriage by yourself, don’t be afraid of asking a professional’s help. A licensed marriage therapist or counselor can help your get through different marriage obstacles and teach you ways on how to rekindle the fire in your marriage. If possible, you and your spouse should attend counseling together.
7. Take the time off. Asking for personal space doesn’t necessarily mean that you are separating from your spouse or asking for a divorce. This just means that you need to think things through and assess your true feelings amidst the pain, anger, bitterness and frustrations. It is important to note that spending the time apart would not automatically mean that everything will be back to normal. At times, this may also provoke you to leave your troubled marriage.
A lifelong commitment, marriage requires a lot of effort, respect time, trust, patience and, of course, love. Without these contributing factors, a marriage will eventually lead to divorce. Those who prefer to stick it out are often in misery and emotional pain. If you want to grow old together with your spouse, you should follow the above mentioned tips that’ll fix a marriage.
By Bernard Branson
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By: Kayle Ameli
If you want your first date to be successful, it all depends on the kind of conversation you involve your partner in and a lot depends on how you say it rather than what you say. Here are a couple of tips that help you have a great and exciting first date:
The fact that you are not really aware of what to expect from your potential partner makes first dates nerve-racking and this can turn out to be a blooper sometimes. In order to avoid an added tension to your nerves, make sure that you bear certain things in your mind. First things first, make sure you maintain eye contact all through your conversation with your potential date or partner. It is important that you don’t make it as weird as a staring game and seem confident. In case you feel like your voice is about to give way or becoming shaky, pause for a moment, take a deep breath and then start speaking. That said,you must always make sure to keep a close watch on any nervous behavior such as biting your nails or tapping your fingers or shaking your feet. This not only annoys your date but also lets them know that youre more of an anxious type.
Never be a Chatterbox
In an effort to impress ones potential partner, we get so engrossed in the conversation that we often end up chatting too much to the point of boring them. The best thing to counteract this is to ask wise questions and make the conversation more interesting. For instance, you could ask them as to how many siblings they have or ask them about the latest books or novels that theyve recently read. While doing this, it is important that you listen closely to what theyre speaking just to let them know that youre interested in their conversation.
Keep it Simple
Whenever you strike a conversation with a stranger, always make sung re that you dont bore them. If they question you back, make sure that your answers are always crisp and short, instead of being too elaborate. Keep employment related queries simple and don’t go on bragging about your achievements. Try not to get too emotional in your conversation as this can be a huge turn off for them.
Keep Your Date Short
The first thing that you need to be aware of is to keep your date talks as short and crisp as possible. Make it in such a way that both of you would want to go together again on a second date. This is the best way to keep the other one wanting to know more about you.
By: Debbie Schaefer
It seems everyone wants to provide marriage advice to couples who are struggling, but unfortunately, sometimes that advice is coming from people who are not doing so well in their own marriage. In fact, this advice may be coming from someone who has been married and divorced more than once, so you have to be careful about the guidance being provided.
Hopefully, our 30 years of marital experience and the fact that we are truly soul mates qualifies us to provide some concrete ideas on how to improve your marriage. These ideas are not new; they are not radically different from what you may have read or heard in the past, but these are relationship changing fundamentals that you must work on constantly.
Find Time For Each Other Daily.
The best marriage advice we can give to any couple is find quality time to spend with your mate every day. It amazes us how many couples find time for their friends, co-workers and relatives, but don’t carve out a few minutes each day to spend some quality time to catch up with their mate.
We always tell couples that love is a decision that people make, but so is giving time to our partner. You have to decide to make time with your mate a priority then hold yourself accountable to giving them your time.
Respect Your Spouse.
One of the best pieces of marriage advice that we were given in our pre-marital counseling was to respect your spouse. That means respecting their opinions, ideas and suggestions even if you don’t entirely agree with them. Respect their time by not keeping them waiting all the time. Respect their quiet time because everyone needs to have some alone time. Respect their efforts at work and at home; too many spouse are overly critical of their mates and are always demanding more from them. Respect in marriage means recognizing your spouses needs and working to fulfill those needs.
Get On The Same Page Financially.
The one piece of marriage advice that seems to go by the wayside quickly once the “I DOs” are said centers around the family finances. Couples who start out with a household budget seem to get out of financial balance quickly once there is great sale at the department store or something breaks down. In order to have a long, happy marriage, you have to be in agreement on financial matters. You have to have a budget you both can agree on and then stick to it religiously.
Keep Your Sex Life Fun And Exciting.
Some couple don’t like when we give marriage advice about their sex life because that seems too personal, but trust us, if more couples would talk about their wants and needs sexually with their marriage partner there would be a whole lot less couples having affairs. One study we saw recently, indicated that marriage partners that have affairs did so because they felt they could not talk about sex with their mate. The lack of communication about sex in their marriage led them to seek a “fun and exciting” partner who fulfilled their desires.
You know what? Your spouse can do the same thing if you just let them know what you want and desire from them sexually. Find meaningful, fun ways to spice up your love life and you will find marriage is so boring afterall.
Try To Out Give Your Spouse.
Now this bit of marriage advice may fall into the category of new or original to you. What do we mean by “out give your spouse”? Well, it starts with the basic advice that most of us hear before we get married that says, “Marriage requires a lot of give and take”. Obviously, this is true, but if you really want to have a winning formula for a long, passion-filled marriage then try giving a lot more than taking from your mate. Give them more of your time by taking the on a date to do what they enjoy. For women that might mean going to a few ball games or manly events. For a man that may mean going to the ballet or orchestra every once in a while.
Try giving your mate more praise and recognition than they give you. This could simply be sending them a “love” text or note. Or it may mean, complimenting your mate for the way their hair looks, the clothes they are wearing or some other physical attribute. The real point is to make a conscious decision each day to give your spouse more that you take and do it joyfully and with deep love.
None of the marriage advice above requires much money or time; it just requires a commitment on both partners part to really work at their marriage daily, but not as a chore. Making your spouse happy should give you a great deal of satisfaction and joy so if you are both working to accomplish this then you will have a very passionate, fulfilling marriage.
By: Pearl Jones
A romantic relationship is something that almost all of us are always on the lookout for. However, finding such a relationship can be quite an uphill task for many.
There are many reasons for the difficulty faced but the fact of the matter is that finding people of the same mentality and wavelength is difficult and another very important reality is that relationships can be very hard to sustain.
They are never perfect and you need to compromise and be willing to solve conflicts positively. There are many things that you can do to find your soul mate. But before you embark on your quest, you should remember to keep a few things in perspective so that you do not end up regretting your actions.
Avoid making the search of a mate the center of your existence
Your life should not solely revolve around that purpose. Rather, you should focus on activities that you enjoy doing, your health, relationships with friends and family and career. Keep your concentration on being happy and you will lead a balanced life and you will appear to be a really interesting person when you meet that someone special.
Beware of first impressions
Many of us count on first impressions but remember that it may not be reliable always. This is especially true in the case of Internet dating as people hardly portray themselves accurately. It does not matter how or where you have met somebody but you should always take some time to actually know that person properly. You should judge a person in a variety of contexts – some good and some bad to actually find out his or flaws and good qualities.
Honesty about shortcomings and flaws
Nobody is perfect and everybody has some flaw or the other. However, some of these might lead to problems in the future. So the best thing to do is to be honest with yourself as well as your prospective mate. If you want a lasting relationship, you should be with a person who loves you exactly for who you are and not somebody who they you would want to be. In some cases, the things you see as flaws seem appealing and quirky to another person. Encourage the other person as well to shed all pretense and open up.
Investing in vertical relationship first
Before embarking on physical relationship, you should focus on getting to know the person well. Know the mind well before knowing the physical. This will help you achieve a much better relationship later, which is sound and healthy both on mental and physical fronts.
While going for online dating and even matchmaking services, be sure to be spontaneous and have lots of fun. Treat them as fun and light social occasions instead of high-intensity job interviews. You should treat it as an opportunity in meeting new people and expanding your social circle and it will become both more enjoyable and potentially successful as well.